For those of you following along, I have been missing my scheduled blog entries. They average about 5 a week, but yours truly has not listened to her own advice. I succumbed to the negative thoughts that the world threw at me and strayed. The first Bible verse that popped in my head when I started journaling this morning was from a Bible study. This wise lady told us about how we sometimes throw a pity party of 1 and curl up in a cave not realizing that we are always under the protection of God (paraphrased from lecture by Denise Cunningham. https://danddministries.com/).
“13 So it was, when Elijah heard it, that he wrapped his face in his mantle and went out and stood in the entrance of the cave. Suddenly a voice came to him, and said, “What are you doing here, Elijah?”
-1 Kings 19:13
You see, someone said something to me that triggered an avalanche that I could not fight on my own. Instead of praying, I decided to stay up all night, not talk to God and go on my phone doing exactly the opposite of what I should have been doing. Almost 6 hours later, I finally prayed and felt a calm that I could have felt as soon as I felt defeated.
To illustrate how I got through that night and the next day, I have to walk you through a story from my childhood. When I was little, my self-defense mechanism was pinching. If I felt threatened or was out of reasonable arguments, I would pinch. One fine weekend, I pinched my sister and drew blood. She cried, mom came to her rescue and yelled at me. I was sent to my room and I cried. Dad got involved, he patched up my sister and settled her down and then walked over to me and heard my side of the story.
He then broke it down into two clear issues. One, my sister was not being nice to me, so it was fair for me to be upset and two, my reaction to the situation was wrong. So, my little mind had to work out that this habit I was forming was not a good one. There were other ways to deal with situations that hurt. Fast forward a few days, and I was holding my dad’s had and felt a scab on the back of his hand, I asked him how he got the scab and he reminded me of the day when we were at the park and I pinched him for not getting me a balloon. I was devastated, that might have been the last time I pinched anybody. The hardened criminal was reformed.
My point is that there was an opportunity for transformation. I was led to change, and my father was there to guide me through the change, how much more will our Father in Heaven? We all know He is always with us.
“I will not leave you nor forsake you”
-Joshua 1:5
He did not leave Jonah even when he was disobeying God. This is because of who God is and not because of who we are. So, yesterday was a day that I should have submitted to transformation. If I understand our God well enough, He is perfecting me.
“6 being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ;”
-Philippians 1:6
If, however, in this situation I am innocent, then I should have still let God take over instead of finding my cave. I know He will not take it easy on those that treat His children poorly.
“Fear not, for I am with you;
-Isaiah 41:10
Be not dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you,
Yes, I will help you,
I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.’“
Either way, it is glorious. God is in the dismal valleys as much as He is on the mountain tops. If you are hurting today and if it is your fault, be open to the perfection. If it is not your fault, forgive in the assurance that vengeance belongs to God.
Dear Jesus,
I missed opening my eyes to Your presence in the valley yesterday. Thank You for pulling me out of it and putting me back on track. May I have the goodness to show the grace and mercy to others in the same measure as you show me. Please grant me the ability to recognize Your presence sooner in the valley of life. Amen.