Not too many years ago, as a new Christian, I walked into my beautiful church in my pretty outfit, settled into my usual spot, and fully expected to be told that God loves me and that everything was going to be puppies and rainbows. Instead, I was hit with a sermon titled “You Are Barabbas.” The pastor laid the foundation for who Barabbas was using a clip from “The Passion of the Christ,” and I was simultaneously shocked and deeply moved by His love.
“So Pilate, wanting to gratify the crowd, released Barabbas to them; and he delivered Jesus, after he had scourged Him, to be crucified.“
-Mark 15:15
While I absorbed the message, the arrogance that I was somehow different quietly stuck around. In retrospect, the words of C.S. Lewis, that Christianity is harder and easier at the same time, made me want to disprove the hard part to myself. After all, most hard things in life can be broken down and solved. I intended to take the same approach: identify the problem, come up with a strategy, break it down, and execute. Nothing hard about that, is there now? The corporate problem-solver meeting the gospel head on.
If you chuckled at my arrogance, that was well deserved. Let me tell you, this is not a problem for a little human heart to solve. I now see myself in every mistake highlighted in the Bible. These are not issues from years gone by. They are present and alive, right now, in a heart being transformed each day by our Lord and Savior. In some cases, multiple times a day.
“For I say, through the grace given to me, to everyone who is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think soberly, as God has dealt to each one a measure of faith.”
-Romans 12:3
For those of you who are new Christians, and for those who have not yet accepted the Lord, let me tell you that this experience is deeply rewarding. You do not have to dress up for this fight. Just show up. Jesus will hold your hand, lead you, and guide you. And while the arrogance is being replaced by humility, it does not bruise the ego. It feels uplifting and cathartic, the way only Jesus can make us feel.
And as for me, I am still very much a work in progress, wanting to believe that my relationship with Jesus is tight, and yet I stray. I stray often. He draws me back and continues His work in me. If I understand our one true God correctly, He has not changed through all the ages. He drew the ancients with loving kindness and He will draw us the same way, continuing to perfect us until the work is done.
“But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the Lord.”
-2 Corinthians 3:18
Dear God,
Thank You for being my potter, shaping me into Your perfect child. Give me the strength to endure the transformation and the humility to trust You completely. Through Your loving kindness, grace, and mercy, I know that when I cross over, You will have made me perfect. I pray in Jesus’ name. Amen.